Last week, we learned about geology and open hole log interpretation. More interesting than the subject matter was our instructor for this segment. He is a Nigerian man resembling Don Cheadle. Don has worked in Nigeria, Iran, Pakistan, Oman and probably other places he has yet to mention. Don occasionally drops on the floor spontaneously in the middle of lecturing and does a few push ups.
During the class, Don looked at me and said, “You will not go to Oman, you will go to Egypt! And they will make you home country. Whateberger will look for any way to save money on you! HAH-HAAA”
Don finished ever concept by nodding to us and saying “Okee Dokee??” or “Do you know what I am talkin about?”
“Why don’t you work in Nigeria? You will love it. AFRICA!! HAH-HAAA you will love it.”
“It is easy to kill a Nigerian in Iran. The Nigerian government will say, ‘one Nigerian is dead. Who cares!’ If one American dies in Iran, the government is flying jets over there and starting wars. It is not easy to kill an American in Iran.”
“AFRICA!!! In America, you can not beat people. In Africa, a man and another man can grab you by your legs and arms, and a third man can beat you. The police will drive by and not say anything. They may stop and say, ‘why are you beating him?’ you will say ‘He’s a bad boy!!’ Police will say ‘Oh, he is a bad boy?’ and then help you beat him.”
Don is also an avid proponent of the “break”. We take breaks every 30-40 minutes. Don will explain, “A pee break is 5 minutes. Poo break is 20 minimum. It take time to get that thing out. Especially if you don’t drink enough water. HAH- HAAA!”
On Friday, I got a call from my boss’s boss. It went something like this- “Oman can’t take you. Now its between Qatar and Kuwait. You pick. If you say no, you’re still not staying in Houma.” Fearing the prospect of moving to a cold location, I went with Qatar. Don was somewhat right….